My character and ethics have been shaped in many different was throughout my life. Whether the impact was big or small, stuff has changed who I am. I know for sure of at least one thing that has changed who I am as a person. It happened to me when I was 10, and it has happened to millions of other kids around the world. My character, ego, demeanor, and my entire thought process changed the night my parents divorced.
This night, will forever be etched into my mind. It is something I know I’ll never forget, because that is the night my entire life changed. I’m not sure if it is because I was scared, because I did not understand, or what the reasoning was but I remember every little detail from that night.
I was a 10 year old boy, eating hi cereal and watching cartoons late at night. Fruity Pebbles and Spongebob Squarepants., the episode where the tattletale strangler was after Spongeob. I was eating my cereal out of one of the bowls with a built-in straw so I could drink the milk afterwards. It just got to the part where Spongebob found a receipt from the “Phony Bologna Moustache Emporium” and then I hear it. Bam, Bam, Bam! It sounded as if someone was beating down our walls with a sledgehammer. I remember getting chills because I had no clue where the noise came from. I now know that the noise was the sound of my dad punching three separate holes through the walls.
I remember waiting in the living room with the show still playing, not sure of what had just happened. It felt like I was there forever, but I remember seeing my dad walk out of his room and come down the hallway. This was the first time I had ever seen my dad cry. I asked over and over, “What’s wrong?”, “What is it?” His only response before he walked out of the house was, “Me and your mom aren’t together anymore”. After that sentence, my mind goes blank. I only remember feeling this empty feeling in my chest and not feeling safe anymore.
It took quite a while to get used to honestly. The separate birthdays, the separate holidays, and not knowing exactly where I was going to be sleeping at night. It was all a new and surreal feeling, but once I got used to it, that was my new normal. I’m used to bouncing from house to house, bed to bed, and from friends to friends. I’ve lived in a lot of places because of this though. It made me a more sociable person. I learned to fit in no matter where I was and I think that is where I got my people skills from. The only one constant thing I’ve always had, was my little brother. He was 6 when everything happened so he doesn’t really remember what it’s like to have a whole family. I wish I could go back and change that, because nobody deserves to grow up wondering whether or not they’re going to see one of their parents this week.
Their divorce was a bad thing for us, for me especially because I know what it could’ve been. I remember how normal my life could have been. It has made me an independent person, someone who doesn’t rely on anyone, and can manage to make just about any situation work. I’m confident this is the reason I am so grateful for what I have, because I know somewhere others will have it even worse. My character was hardened and I was made a different person that who I was going to be. I think about others, their situations, and try to imagine what they’ve got going on that I couldn’t even be able to understand. It made me think differently. Although it was an awful event, I think I am lucky it happened. Because of it, it made me who I am and I am beyond happy with who I am as a person. If they would have stayed together, I can’t imagine who I’d be today. On top of all that, I have never seen my mom or dad happier that they are now. They keep in touch, but have rebuilt their lives and their selves, just as my brother and I have done.
It is crazy that someone else’s decision can impact and change my life forever. Just by them making one decision, I am an entirely different person now because of it. Nothing is the same to me anymore. I can only really wonder what my brother has been through as he has never really talked about it. This has strengthened the bond between him and I and I know nothing will ever separate us. We’ve become very close and would do anything for each other. I am beyond thankful for that and it feels good knowing that that will never change. Their divorce changed so much for me. It effected all aspects of my life, far more than they, or anyone else will ever realize.